Jeff Pearlman: I have a bone to pick

This gem of an article caught my eye on SI today.  It’s tone, obviously relentless against “The Rocket” (which, according to the author, is what he goes by — not Roger or Rog) was familiar:  I’ve read this type of writing before.

Lo and behold it was from Jeff Pearlman! The same man who wrote The Rocket Who Fell to Earth, the same man who managed to get a quote, that I’m pretty sure this woman will go straight to hell for, regarding my late (and beloved) grandmother:

“Bess looked better in her casket than she ever did alive.”

Truly, you have to be a real piece of work to say a comment like that.  Especially about a person who’s dead — and after you’ve attended their funeral.

But that’s the kind of guy Jeff is.  He gets the “best” out of people.  Many of you may be wondering why I am making claims about Jeff without knowing him.  Well, isn’t that interesting?  Considering that’s exactly what Jeff does with Roger.  I feel no remorse for making these comments, much like he doesn’t feel anything about his own personal opinions (read: nothing factual).

So, Jeff.   How are you?  How’s life?  I’m sure with the recent news that “The Rocket” has been indicted, you’ve been trying so hard to write the perfect piece about how arrogant and vain he is.  Maybe this is going out on a limb, but are you affiliated with Congress by any chance?

I’d love to know when you met Mr. Clemens and how you gained all of this “factual” information on him– his personality, his feelings and how he lives his life.  A lot of what you write about is based on accounts from other people and other journalists (ironically what got Roger into this indictment in the first place), with no authentic basis for the claims.  It’s all “he said, she said.”  It’s funny, how old are you again?  If I didn’t know better, I could have sworn you for a middle school girl, sucking the tit of the gossip train when the “Queen Bee” starts to be taken down.

I want to make one thing clear regarding a statement made in the article: “The Rocket” (I have to call him that since he doesn’t go by Uncle Rog.  Only “The Rocket” will do, according to you at least) does not see himself a just a baseball player.  If anything, he sees himself as a father.  He has done everything in his power to give his family a life that he never had, and, if anything, he’s a wonderful, caring and responsible Dad.  (And this isn’t just an assumption — I know this to be true, first hand.  I don’t have to feed off hearsay to make points.)

He’s also been a great uncle, providing for his nieces and nephews as if they were his own children — I won’t taint the wonderful memories by putting them in this post, but will save for when the time is right.

Another thing: talk about a low-blow on naming his kids all with the letter K.  By refering to the “K’s” as a bad thing is completely and utterly deplorable — there is no reason to be ashamed of why he named his kids what he named them.  Get some better material to rag on him about.  You’re pathetic.

Obviously, I’m on a tyrade about this.  I’ve had plenty of feelings on Mr. Pearlman and his own sense of arrogance for awhile now.  If I could have commented on the SI article, I would have, however I figure I’d give my two cents on my own personal platform.

Oh, and by the way Jeff — this is to mock you.

Best,
Kirbie

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