So check this video out. It’s from my future superiors, Rachel and Erika @ Chic Events. (BTW: Do you call a business an “employer” even when you’re an intern and not an employee? That always gets me.) It’s so weird how technology works these days because I haven’t even met them but I have a sense of how they work just based on their youtube vids. So watch this and then read on.
Did you watch it? Okay good. Now you’ll understand what I’m about to do! Kirbie’s very own “Don’t Do That.” I’ve had a few posts that I could consider “don’t do thats,” such as don’t act like a douche and don’t get on my last nerve. But now I think I’ll go more in depth because several things in the past week that have happened are deserving of a “don’t do that.”
- Hey, creepy guy that won’t leave me and my friends alone at the bar last night: I don’t know you and harassing me for a ride after 10 awkward minutes of conversation is weird. Don’t do that. I don’t care if I live next door to you. If I say I’m not taking you home, I’m not going to, and furthermore when you start to beg it makes me think you’re a freak and frankly has me considering kicking you in the face (trust me. I can do it. I have an amazing high-kick). Did it ever cross your mind that, um, hello? It’s not safe for women such as myself to offer rides to STRANGERS. You’re lucky I don’t post your name on here because you would very well kiss any chance of having a date good-bye. So you’re welcome for the anonymity.
- Man with the bandana and really bad perm at my favorite spot, The Cellar: A) Throwing ice at the bartender because he is taking too long is not okay. Don’t do that. You won’t get any drinks out of it, and you might just get your butt kicked, which is exactly what happened to you. B) When I’m rapping to Eminem and people start cheering me on, that is not an invitation to start a duet. Don’t do that. I am singing solo for a reason, and it is because people enjoy my rapping by itself.
- Hey, friend. When I tell you my dreams are coming true and I’m moving to LA, and I might be dirt poor but I’m just excited to get out there because it something I’ve wanted my whole life, and every other bloody person that has talked to me for five minutes knows I’ve always wanted to move out there, and then you respond in monotone with “That’s cool,” it’s rude and it hurts my feelings. Don’t do that. It makes me think you’re a witch, except with a “b.”
- Lastly, most of you know that one of my family members has been getting a lot of media scrutiny lately, so I don’t feel weird mentioning this. Although things that have been said are not true and it would assumingly bring my family down, we have remained positive and upbeat to push on. But, if I don’t know you very well and one of the first things you ask me about is the issues and consequences of those issues, it really is offensive. DON’T DO THAT. You don’t know me and you have no right to ask me about that. If he was a normal citizen, the issue would be the big, fat elephant in the room, but nobody would comment or ask about it – because that’s rude. Don’t do it! Don’t.
That be it. Off to the rec! Xo.
Kirbie Johnson 
Your “Don’t do Thats” are actually better than the girls on Youtube. :)I’m sorry you have to go through the things you do. I’m happy to be a word of encouragement from Canada.Heck, if you need it I’ll be a bouncer for you too to get the creeps away.Good luck with everything.Tim
Okay, so you crack me up! I love reading your blog and it gives me relief somehow to know that I have really raised you right and that you CAN take care of yourself in that big ole mean world out there!:)